Russia Pulls Troops Out of Georgia, Chechnya, to Bolster Black Rise Fleet Strength

After last night's devastating loss to the pathetic, carebear pilots of Genetisystems' Elite Tactical Airwing, Prime Minister Dmitri Medvedev of the Russian Federation has announced he will withdrawal troops from both Georgia and Chechnya to reinforce his beleaguered digital space navy forces in the Black Rise Region.

"I thought the days of the Cold War were long past us," said Medvedev. "Days of uncertainty, deceit, and terror are being brought back by this rogue element of the western regime."

"I am saddened by this turn of events," said Vladimir Putin, Prime Minister of the Russian Federation. "I sought a different future that apparently eludes us all."

Russia has re-allocated two armored divisions and three squadrons of air superiority forces to reinforce their Russian privateers working in Black Rise. The troops are expected to arrive before year's end.

In a solemn press conference, one pilot of the routinely harried pirate organization took the podium with a simple, but eye-opening statement.

When asked to comment on her corporations anti-piracy policy, Allya Modrane was reluctant to comment. Fortunately for The Daily Poddite, Genetisystems' Director Stetin was happy to oblige.

"Oh we killed them good," said Stetin. "I don't even turn the guns on anymore. It's just getting easy and we need a challenge."

"Hell, my Orca is on the kill mail," he added.

Concord agents were pleased with the destruction of the pirate fleet and gladly awarded bounties to the Genetisystems pilots.

"We're just glad they are doing the job we cannot," said Helmut Wunderschpoon, Concord Press Secretary. "Kehjari, Martoh, Kinakka -- long have these star systems been out of control and rampant with piracy."

"It seems a new age has dawned?"

Genetisystems Recruiting Dedicated Meat Shields to Repel Sansha Nation

With the onset of the Sansha Nation's publicly announced invasions of known space in New Eden, Genetisystems leadership has decided to prepare for open hostilities and begin recruiting dedicated meat shields.

"A lot of us are flying really good ships now," said Allya Modrane, CEO of Genetisystems. "It'd be a shame to lose them to pirates when we could hire others to do this for us."

"Our benefits plan is comprehensive," explained Sturm Wellington, Director. "We offer no ship replacement, no encouragement, and no share of the loot."

"What you do receive is the right to fly with us and shield good pilots like Train Tracks, Stetin, and XivOps from certain and ugly doom."

"Some would call it a stepping stone into the hallowed ranks of Genetisystems," said Cheif Astartes, renowned combat pilot and former pirate. "Not me, but some."

Pilots interested in a Meat Shield position should be able to supply and fly a battlecruiser with an excellent tank, preferably two for when their primary ship is destroyed. Interested parties should inquire with Ranger McFriendly, who, by his very name sake, is nice.

Genetisystems Celebrates First Month in Space by Destroying 1 Billion ISK in Pirate Tonnage

After a month of conducting commercial and combat operations in low security space, Genetisystems has destroyed well over 1 Billion ISK in pirate tonnage.

The push over the billion mark was sped up with the arrival of a Tengu and Vagabond pilot in the home system last night. After what resulted in a stunning, all hands on deck fleet battle, the Tengu and Vagabond lay destroyed and salvaged with only one Genetisystems' Hurricane loss.

"I had a long call with our corporate accountant last night," said Stetin. "I was having trouble conversing with him clearly as he was flying a Mastodon. You know Minmatar tech. But it was clear to both of us that we had cleared the billion mark."

"Carnage!" added XivOps, a Genetisystems Director.

The first anti-Pirate victory was against a Megathron, which fell to an ambush totaling 7 Genetisystems pilots and 1 ally. A short while later the company was able to destroy a Pilgrim force recon ship and a Drake.

"Only a month ago we were crapping our pants about a lone Ishtar mercenary and freaking out about friendly fire," said Sturm Wellington, a former Director who was disgraced after an intergalactic incident with Yellow Star Corps. "I literally pooped a little when that Ishtar charged us."

"I'm not proud," he added.

"We've proven quite a few times now that arrogant pirates will die when they enter our turf," said PsyKrow, the fleet commander for the majority of the anti-pirate battles. "At this point, I'm more concerned with wife aggro than pirates."

Action against the local pirates in system, long a menace to inhabitants, has brought out courage in even the most unlikely of pilots. Train Tracks, mop boy, has been in every pirate battle and has survived all of them to emerge as one of the true heroes of the Genetisystems fleet.

"They kept saying to me, 'go away mop boy,' or 'my ship's dirty mop boy!" he explained. "Well, I don't expect to hear none of this 'mop boy' crap come Monday."

From the top down, Genetisystems is energized and excited.

"I think it's all due to my iron fisted rule," said Allya Modrane, CEO and Dictator of Genetisystems. "I've slapped a few pilots around and made a few calls that nobody wanted me to make."

"But I got it done, didn't I? I mean we?" she added.

Genetisystems has recently added four pilots to help aid in the fight against piracy and profit from low security space. With the value of Genetisystems stock at an all time high, it is the best move possible for all.

Genetisystems Plans First War Game

On , crack members of Genetisystem's Tactical Airwing will be dividing into Aggressor and Defender Squadrons to engage in the first Genetisystems' War Game. 

The first war game, located in , will allow both teams to learn more about the always terrifying and complicated Gate Camp Scenario. 

"It is my sincere hope that Aggressor Squadron will prevail," said Sturm Wellington, the Aggressor Fleet Commander. "I plan to get crafty, wily, and devious."

"Like a space coyote," he added.

It will be the task of Wellington and his Aggressor Squadron to jump blindly through the gate and engage the waiting Defender Squadron, though exact details of Aggressor Squadron's objectives remain classified.

"Aggressor is filled with tossers," said Cheif Astartes, Defender Squadron Fleet Commander. "Plus, we've got a pilot very close to one of their own."

"I always say, if you aren't cheating you aren't trying. And it's only cheating if you get caught," added Astartes. 

It is rumored that Allya Modrane and Stetin, members of the opposing squadrons, know each other outside of the pod realm. If this is truly the case, both commanders will need to keep close tabs on their security.

"These war games are a tiny part of Genetisystems' broad vision for our part in low security space and beyond," said Allya Modrane, CEO of Genetisystems. "By learning to better conduct ourselves in war, we will better serve the needs of our commercial interests and maintain the security of space between our home and the safety of empire."

Future war games are already in the works, including ones that test cloaked ambushes, protecting miners, ferrying goods, and grand multi-system battles. Genetisystems allies are encouraged to participate and can do so by contacting the War Games Marshall Sturm Wellington. 

Study Reveals Schizophrenia a Problem in Low Sector Space

After a month in Low Security space, the staff psychologists employed by Genetisystems Elite Psychiatric wing have observed that schizophrenia is highly common in low security space.

"We have a yellow star," reads the corporate biography of the Yellow Star Corporation. "All members need to be me or an alt of me. Please apply to me if you're me and want to join."

"I swear you cannot go 2 AU without tripping over someone who thinks they are someone else...at the same time," explains Sturm Wellington, part-time psychologist. "People are crazy out here, but it is lonely."

"I wish I had an imaginary friend myself," he added.

Concord has long been accused of looking the other way when it comes to rampant schizophrenia, multiple personalities, and what's commonly referred to as "alt syndrome" out in the belts.

"I must admit to...suffering from slight 'alt syndrome' myself," said Stetin, Director of Genetisystems. "I checked in at my local station's medical bay. Not only did they say it was okay, but they encouraged me to get an alt."

"Some days I think Concord just doesn't care about enforcing the law."

It is yet to be seen whether 'alt syndrome' will have a negative impact on New Eden or its inhabitants.