Genetisystems Celebrates First Month in Space by Destroying 1 Billion ISK in Pirate Tonnage

After a month of conducting commercial and combat operations in low security space, Genetisystems has destroyed well over 1 Billion ISK in pirate tonnage.

The push over the billion mark was sped up with the arrival of a Tengu and Vagabond pilot in the home system last night. After what resulted in a stunning, all hands on deck fleet battle, the Tengu and Vagabond lay destroyed and salvaged with only one Genetisystems' Hurricane loss.

"I had a long call with our corporate accountant last night," said Stetin. "I was having trouble conversing with him clearly as he was flying a Mastodon. You know Minmatar tech. But it was clear to both of us that we had cleared the billion mark."

"Carnage!" added XivOps, a Genetisystems Director.

The first anti-Pirate victory was against a Megathron, which fell to an ambush totaling 7 Genetisystems pilots and 1 ally. A short while later the company was able to destroy a Pilgrim force recon ship and a Drake.

"Only a month ago we were crapping our pants about a lone Ishtar mercenary and freaking out about friendly fire," said Sturm Wellington, a former Director who was disgraced after an intergalactic incident with Yellow Star Corps. "I literally pooped a little when that Ishtar charged us."

"I'm not proud," he added.

"We've proven quite a few times now that arrogant pirates will die when they enter our turf," said PsyKrow, the fleet commander for the majority of the anti-pirate battles. "At this point, I'm more concerned with wife aggro than pirates."

Action against the local pirates in system, long a menace to inhabitants, has brought out courage in even the most unlikely of pilots. Train Tracks, mop boy, has been in every pirate battle and has survived all of them to emerge as one of the true heroes of the Genetisystems fleet.

"They kept saying to me, 'go away mop boy,' or 'my ship's dirty mop boy!" he explained. "Well, I don't expect to hear none of this 'mop boy' crap come Monday."

From the top down, Genetisystems is energized and excited.

"I think it's all due to my iron fisted rule," said Allya Modrane, CEO and Dictator of Genetisystems. "I've slapped a few pilots around and made a few calls that nobody wanted me to make."

"But I got it done, didn't I? I mean we?" she added.

Genetisystems has recently added four pilots to help aid in the fight against piracy and profit from low security space. With the value of Genetisystems stock at an all time high, it is the best move possible for all.

Pilot Gets Shot Down, Blames Girlfriend

An aloof pod pilot was shot down Tuesday night while dealing with his girlfriend.

Sturm Wellington and other elements of Genetisystems' elite Tactical Airwing were patrolling low sector space in Black Rise when fleet discipline fell apart, resulting in casualties.

"I ordered the fleet to hold on the gate," said Malek Treiss, fleet commander. "Everyone called in affirmative, except Sturm Wellington."

"He just disappeared," said Treiss.

The members of the fleet tried to communicate with Wellington via all possible methods, including shouting into the comm system, sending mail messages, and even ramming his Griffin.

Then, the inexplicable happened.

"Sturm came back onto the comms and shouted 'Sorry, back guys!'" explained Stetin. "Then he just jumped through the gate."

"It was one of the dumbest things I've seen in space," said Stetin.

"I immediately ordered Sturm back," said Treiss. "Unfortunately, there were pirates waiting for him on the other side and his Tech 1 Frigate exploded like a soft candy."

After the short, but hectic chase by the pirates, Wellington and the fleet were able to gather in station and debrief on the incident.

"My girlfriend called me while we were on patrol," explained Wellington. "I tried to get her off to phone by repeatedly shouting "I'm in a combat zone!"

"She just wouldn't listen though," he said. "They never do."

When Sturm Wellington was able to finally return to his Griffin's HUD, he found himself alone at the gate and assumed the fleet had jumped to the next system designated for the patrol. Unfortunately, the fleet was still in system, though now under cloak.

"I really wanted to try out my new cloaking device," explained Ty Langstrom, fleet member.

"We'll need to work with Sturm on his fleet discipline," said Malek Treiss. "Girlfriend or no, that sort of reckless flying will get us all podded."

Wellington's girlfriend was not available for comment.